Jenny Lavers
Episode 101

Narrator: Welcome friends to another episode of the Story and Experience podcast. Join your host, Japhet De Oliveira with his guest today and discover the moments that shape us, our families, and communities.

Japhet De Oliveira: Hey, welcome friends to another episode of the Story and Experience podcast. I'm here at Adventist Health Bakersfield Hospital in Bakersfield, California. Okay, the guest has already started. This is good. And we're going to talk about stories and experiences that shaped this person into the leader that they are today. I have a hundred questions, the first 10 I ask, and then they get to pick numbers between 11 and 100 where we go and they become a little bit more vulnerable and more open as we get close to 100. So let me begin straight away with, could you tell us your name and does anybody ever mispronounce it?

Jenny Lavers: My name is Jenny Lavers. My legal name is Jennifer. I really-

Japhet De Oliveira: Your legal name?

Jenny Lavers: Yes.

Japhet De Oliveira: I've never had anybody say my legal name.

Jenny Lavers: When I was little my middle name is Gail, so Jennifer Gail. It rolls off the tongue when you're in trouble and so I prefer Jenny. And then people always mispronounce, they want to say labor, labors for my last name all the time with a B instead of a V.

Japhet De Oliveira: I can see that. I can see that. My legal name. Yeah, I'm sorry. I'm kind of taken back by that. All right, Jenny, with your legal name being Jennifer, what do you do for work?

Jenny Lavers: I am the operations executive and administrator of the Bakersfield Heart Hospital.

Japhet De Oliveira: Brilliant, brilliant. And how long have you been doing this?

Jenny Lavers: New to both of those roles. I was the service line and ancillary executive before that and just moved into this in September.

Japhet De Oliveira: And it's fantastic because that's joined the family of Adventist Health and so it's expansions. Growth is great. You enjoy it, I presume.

Jenny Lavers: I do, it's fun.

Japhet De Oliveira: I know, I know. I'm kidding. I know you enjoy this. This is great. Now what did you do before all this? You said service line and?

Jenny Lavers: Yeah, so I was the service line and ancillary executive for Adventist Health here in Kern County. And then before that just the administrative director of very similar things. So I've worked for Adventist Health for almost 15 years.

Japhet De Oliveira: Oh wow. Fantastic.

Jenny Lavers: Yeah.

Japhet De Oliveira: Oh, that's great. That's great. All right, so fun question. In the morning when you get up, coffee, tea, water, liquid green smoothie, what's your-

Jenny Lavers: Coffee.

Japhet De Oliveira: Coffee. And how do you have your coffee?

Jenny Lavers: Sugar-free vanilla and Splenda every day.

Japhet De Oliveira: Every day.

Jenny Lavers: Two cups.

Japhet De Oliveira: Two cups, without fail. Do you have the two cups poured into one cup or do you-

Jenny Lavers: No, it's two different cups, because they have to get hot in the middle, so you need the second cup for it to be hot,

Japhet De Oliveira: Like that. All right, that's great.

Jenny Lavers: Not that I'm particular or anything.

Japhet De Oliveira: No, I never guessed. My legal name is... That's never going to go away.

Jenny Lavers: Oh my gosh. I don't know what else to say.

Japhet De Oliveira: I don't know. It's great. I've never had somebody say that. It's just fun. I like that. Where were you born?

Jenny Lavers: Southern California. I grew up in the San Fernando Valley, then moved, I lived in Northridge during the Northridge earthquake. Our house was destroyed and so we ended up moving after that.

Japhet De Oliveira: Oh my, oh my. So now when you were a kid growing up, what did you imagine you were going to grow up to be?

Jenny Lavers: I thought I was going to be a lawyer.

Japhet De Oliveira: Really?

Jenny Lavers: Yeah.

Japhet De Oliveira: Do you like reading?

Jenny Lavers: I loved to read.

Japhet De Oliveira: Yeah, yeah. You like history as well?

Jenny Lavers: I love to read.

Japhet De Oliveira: You love to read. Let me reiterate my answer if you didn't hear.

Jenny Lavers: I don't know why I thought, oh, I'm going to argue with people. That's what I'm going to do.

Japhet De Oliveira: Hey, that's great. That's great. Okay, if people were to describe your personality, would they say you are an introvert or an extrovert and would you agree with their conclusion?

Jenny Lavers: Probably an extrovert.

Japhet De Oliveira: Probably, yeah.

Jenny Lavers: And I would probably agree.

Japhet De Oliveira: Okay. Qualified, but probably. Okay, that's good. And then habits, are you like an early riser or late night owl?

Jenny Lavers: I am both. I'm in the middle of those things.

Japhet De Oliveira: Oh yeah?

Jenny Lavers: Well, I mean, if I had it my way, I would be in bed by nine, 10 o'clock. But life doesn't let that happen. So I'm a very average person. I don't get up super early, I don't go to bed super early. That's a boring answer.

Japhet De Oliveira: Somehow I don't think you're average, but that's okay. We can pretend.

Jenny Lavers: I'm an average sleeper.

Japhet De Oliveira: You're an average sleeper. That's fair enough. All right, then this morning after your average sleeping, when you woke up, what was the first thought that went through your mind?

Jenny Lavers: What do I have to do today?

Japhet De Oliveira: Okay, all right. And is it busy day today?

Jenny Lavers: It is. We all got the pleasure of driving to Delano for a leadership meeting. And so yes, busy day, but every day is a wonderfully busy day.

Japhet De Oliveira: That's fantastic. That is fantastic. All right, here's a leadership question. It's my last one and then I'm going to hand over to you to take it from here. So are you a backseat driver?

Jenny Lavers: No.

Japhet De Oliveira: Okay.

Jenny Lavers: Literally or figuratively?

Japhet De Oliveira: I don't know, legally? No, no.

Jenny Lavers: I mean, as a leader?

Japhet De Oliveira: Yeah.

Jenny Lavers: Oh, probably. Well, gosh, I just have high expectations.

Japhet De Oliveira: That's good. That's good.

Jenny Lavers: But my team knows that, and so I don't need to backseat drive because they already get there.

Japhet De Oliveira: They're all the kind of people.

Jenny Lavers: Yes.

Japhet De Oliveira: It is great to work in a great team.

Jenny Lavers: I have the best team. I mean, I'm really willing to compete for that.

Japhet De Oliveira: Good for you. Good for you. All right, so the floor is open and we go from 11 to 100 and you get to pick where you want to go. So what number would you like to begin?

Jenny Lavers: 22.

Japhet De Oliveira: 22. You said that definitively. If you could be anywhere right now, where would you be?

Jenny Lavers: I would be on a beach.

Japhet De Oliveira: Oh yeah?

Jenny Lavers: I would.

Japhet De Oliveira: A stony beach, okay, I got it. No, no, a beach.

Jenny Lavers: A beach. I'm going to on a big trip this holiday season, and so I'm already envisioning myself of being there.

Japhet De Oliveira: Oh, nice.

Jenny Lavers: I know.

Japhet De Oliveira: Nice. And are you a person who enjoys the beach and the water, the sand?

Jenny Lavers: I do, I love to swim. And so that's a happy place for me.

Japhet De Oliveira: Fantastic, fantastic. All right, that was 22. So where now, up or down?

Jenny Lavers: Let's go up and go to, let's do 33. Let's keep it going.

Japhet De Oliveira: All right. Tell us about the best gift you've ever given someone else.

Jenny Lavers: Oh, best gift I've given someone else. Well, okay, best relative. How about best work gift I've given someone?

Japhet De Oliveira: Okay, that's a good qualifier.

Jenny Lavers: So we had an employee who was celebrating their 25th anniversary and one of the people here Facebook stalked them, found out that they liked to travel. And so we got this big board made for them where every time their family goes to a National Park they can mark it off on there.

Japhet De Oliveira: Oh, nice. Yeah, yeah.

Jenny Lavers: And we presented it to him and his family and so his face and I think he was just so shocked that we-

Japhet De Oliveira: We knew.

Jenny Lavers: Yes.

Japhet De Oliveira: Yeah.

Jenny Lavers: That's probably the best work gift I've given someone.

Japhet De Oliveira: Don't you think it matters? If you know people, you know what to give them.

Jenny Lavers: Yes. And their face when it's like you took the time to really know what they would want and what they like, that's an amazing thing.

Japhet De Oliveira: That is actually part of the fun. Yeah, that's good. All right, that was done. Where do you want to go next?

Jenny Lavers: I mean, let's just 44.

Japhet De Oliveira: 44, okay. All right. What is something that you are proud to have created?

Jenny Lavers: That's an easy one.

Japhet De Oliveira: Oh yeah?

Jenny Lavers: My children. No, I'm just kidding.

Japhet De Oliveira: So you're not proud of the children?

Jenny Lavers: Okay I am proud of them and the AIS Cancer Center. So the AIS Cancer Center, we're celebrating our 10 year anniversary. I had the pleasure of being here when we opened it and watching it and helping it and leading it and growing it, and I am so proud of all of it.

Japhet De Oliveira: That's fantastic. Now tell us a little bit more about that. So imagine somebody who's not heard anything about what's going on here, give them the picture, because it is pretty spectacular.

Jenny Lavers: Yeah. The AIS Cancer Center is part of Adventist Health in Kern County. It's a comprehensive cancer program comprised of medical oncology, radiation oncology, breast surgery, and it has all the bells and whistles of any, I actually think we beat academic institutions. I like to say that we are a boutique in a department store world.

Japhet De Oliveira: That's nice, I like that.

Jenny Lavers: But we do national clinical trials, we beat UCLA's enrollment rates, we provide just the highest level of evidence-based care, and it's all in one location close to people's homes. We see 250 patients every day come through there for treatment. And in the last 10 years we have helped over 15,000 people.

Japhet De Oliveira: Okay. So that was without any preparation, no fact sheets in front of you. Yeah, that's pretty impressive.

Jenny Lavers: When you know, you know.

Japhet De Oliveira: When you know, you know. Okay, that's good. We should have you speak more often. All right, that's good. All right, where do you want to go next after that? That's 44.

Jenny Lavers: 55.

Japhet De Oliveira: 55, all right. Share about something, if you wouldn't mind, that frightens you.

Jenny Lavers: Frightens me. Personally or professionally?

Japhet De Oliveira: The choice is yours. See, that's the beauty [inaudible 00:10:06].

Jenny Lavers: All right. Personally, I definitely, I worry about being a good role model for my children and making sure that they see purpose and does that frighten me? I mean, I guess frighten, it can be interpreted many ways, but just making sure that they don't just see me as someone who works a lot, but someone who makes a difference and making sure that it's meaningful. I was telling someone the other day, we had VIPink, the breast event of the year. We had that last week and my daughter came, she's 12, and she went to school the next day and she told all her friends about it. And that was worth the late night for it, because think about all of those kids who got to hear her take on what she saw.

Japhet De Oliveira: That is a very sacred trust that you're talking about. And I think that if we're not frightened or not worried about it, we don't understand how wonderful it is as well. So I'm with you on that. That's great. All right, that was 55, so?

Jenny Lavers: 66.

Japhet De Oliveira: Okay, all right. Tell us if you would, about one of your favorite songs and what do you love about the song?

Jenny Lavers: I love the Fleetwood Mac Dream song. And it's not the words, it's the feeling. I feel like it's one of those songs you could put on and everybody who listens to it would just take a deep breath and, okay. It's a vibe.

Japhet De Oliveira: Yeah, that's good. That's good.

Jenny Lavers: And so it's like, if I was going to get ready in the morning, that's the song I would put on in the morning.

Japhet De Oliveira: I'm now going to have to go listen to this song. That's good, all right. That was 66. Where next?

Jenny Lavers: 77.

Japhet De Oliveira: I'm just surprised here. All right.

Jenny Lavers: What?

Japhet De Oliveira: No, no, no I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Share with us one of your most cup filling experiences.

Jenny Lavers: I love developing leaders and when you see somebody who is one of those natural leaders that people follow regardless of the title, and then you get to put them in that position and you get to give them the title and then they work their way up from one position to the next. So there was a manager and she was an introvert for sure. That's how she would define herself. And just watching her grow from manager to director to multi-site director to leading one of the largest programs, honestly, for our system in the imaging world, and just watching her just thrive and do so well is so cup filling.

Japhet De Oliveira: That's really good. That's really good. And it's true, you're right about that. That I think you implied this, that introvert, extrovert, it doesn't really... Both of them can be leaders. It's just different ways of addressing things and so, yeah, that's great.

Jenny Lavers: Yeah. And she went from having the highest engagement when she was the manager of her one site to the highest engagement in all of these things. And just what she's capable of doing is amazing.

Japhet De Oliveira: That's great. Good. All right, that was 77. So are you going to 88?

Jenny Lavers: Of course I'm going to 88.

Japhet De Oliveira: Just checking. Just checking. All right. You never know. All right. Tell us about how your life has been different than what you imagined.

Jenny Lavers: So I went to college, graduated from college, met a man and he was a cowboy. I took his hat off, all of the things

Japhet De Oliveira: I've seen Yellowstone, I understand.

Jenny Lavers: Okay. Yeah, it's totally the same. It's totally the same. I grew up in Southern California, I had no idea any of that. So ended up falling in love. He is the sixth generation of ranching for his family. My children are now the seventh, and never in a million years would I have ever thought my life would involve ranching. But it's what balances me is it's this totally different end of the spectrum, but never something I would've imagined.

Japhet De Oliveira: That's fantastic. So do you wear cowboy hats and all?

Jenny Lavers: No, that's a hard pass. I mean, boots when you have to work, but-

Japhet De Oliveira: That was rather quick.

Jenny Lavers: I'm not a cowboy hat kind of girl.

Japhet De Oliveira: Okay. All right, well thank you for that. Now that was 88, so?

Jenny Lavers: Should we go to 99?

Japhet De Oliveira: 99, okay. All right. So 99, is this, what's the most difficult truth you've ever told?

Jenny Lavers: All right.

Japhet De Oliveira: Okay, okay.

Jenny Lavers: So after grad school, I was working for the county for a geriatric mental health program. It was called the WISE team. And I thought I was going to be a social worker before my career path changed. And so the elderly population, people think that mental health issues go away when they get older. I'm giving a lot of lead into the story, but trying to paint the picture. So I was basically case managing this group of people and there was this one woman and she had a obsessive compulsive disorder and she was the main caretaker for her elderly bedbound husband.

And she wanted to care for him so badly and she loved him so much and I could not let them stay in the house together anymore. It wasn't safe. And I had to look her in the eyes and say to her, "I know you love him and I know you want to be here, but you can't." And it's one of those defining life moments. Nothing in my current job will ever be as hard as that moment was. The consequences of that decision and the implications to their lives, but I disrupted their whole life, because it wasn't safe. And I also knew she had such a good heart of wanting to do good. So anyways, I guess that's a long story, but-

Japhet De Oliveira: No, that's a good story.

Jenny Lavers: Hardest truth I've ever had to tell.

Japhet De Oliveira: Yeah, those are real conversations and they're really difficult to do, but you do them because you care about the people. Which actually it works in so many other spaces.

Jenny Lavers: It definitely equips you because when you think, how am I going to get through this? Or what am I going to do? You think back on that moment like, if I can do that, I can do anything.

Japhet De Oliveira: I can do everything else.

Jenny Lavers: Yes.

Japhet De Oliveira: No, that's fair. That's fair. Okay, good. That was 99. So now where would you like to go next?

Jenny Lavers: Well, should we go back to an easy one? Should we go to 11? We skipped 11.

Japhet De Oliveira: How did we do that? I don't know. All right, tell us about the most adventurous food and meal you've ever eaten.

Jenny Lavers: Adventurous food. Well, in Kern County, specifically Bakersfield, we have a large Basque population. Have you ever had Basque food?

Japhet De Oliveira: No.

Jenny Lavers: Okay. It is-

Japhet De Oliveira: Are you preparing me for something?

Jenny Lavers: Well, if you've never had it, it's an experience. So it is several courses and it's soup and salad and fresh tomatoes, and then you go to fried food and vegetables and it's just the most random... There's cheese. If you've never had it, it's an experience.

Japhet De Oliveira: You need to do it. Okay, all right.

Jenny Lavers: But it's so culturally wonderful to sit there and it's all served family style.

Japhet De Oliveira: Oh, nice. Nice.

Jenny Lavers: But that's a fun... For people who come from out of town, they're not expecting it.

Japhet De Oliveira: That's where they go. All right, I will have to test it out sometime. That's good. All right, good. So that was 11. Where next?

Jenny Lavers: Oh my gosh.

Japhet De Oliveira: Yeah, I know.

Jenny Lavers: I have to pick the number?

Japhet De Oliveira: Yeah, that's the sacred part of it. Yeah.

Jenny Lavers: All right. 17.

Japhet De Oliveira: 17. All right. Share what day is most special to you on the entire calendar and why?

Jenny Lavers: Do people make jokes on this question?

Japhet De Oliveira: Of course. I mean, I don't know, yeah.

Jenny Lavers: Because in Miss Congeniality... Do people ever make jokes about that?

Japhet De Oliveira: No. Okay, teach me. Teach me.

Jenny Lavers: In the movie Miss Congeniality-

Japhet De Oliveira: Which has good actors, yeah.

Jenny Lavers: Yeah. They're doing the beauty pageant and they ask her, describe your perfect date, thinking a night out. And she says like April 22nd, because the weather's not too hot and not too cold. Nobody's ever said that?

Japhet De Oliveira: Nobody's ever said that. Now I'm going to have to watch the movie again.

Jenny Lavers: Okay.

Japhet De Oliveira: That's good. That's good. So yeah. So the perfect day?

Jenny Lavers: Day, not date.

Japhet De Oliveira: Date, no date.

Jenny Lavers: Okay.

Japhet De Oliveira: I'm checking the question now. The perfect day. Yes. What is this... My goodness, you messed up the question. I'm sorry. I'm going to... Share what day, D-A-Y is most special to you on the calendar and why?

Jenny Lavers: That is-

Japhet De Oliveira: That's very clever. I like it.

Jenny Lavers: That is, I mean, obviously the births of my children come to mind.

Japhet De Oliveira: Yes, if you had to pick one. No, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I'm kidding.

Jenny Lavers: Gosh. I love them both. It would be a tie for their birthdays.

Japhet De Oliveira: Yeah.

Jenny Lavers: Because-

Japhet De Oliveira: How old are your kids?

Jenny Lavers: 12 and five.

Japhet De Oliveira: 12 and five. Yeah, they're young. That's fantastic. But you still see their baby face, right?

Jenny Lavers: Yes.

Japhet De Oliveira: Yeah. Isn't that incredible? Yeah. My kids are 24 and 20 and I still see their baby face like, why is that 2-year-old driving the car? Yeah, yeah.

Jenny Lavers: My 12-year-old just started playing volleyball and when she's on the court and it's like, are you sure? You're going to get hit. Okay, if this is what we're doing.

Japhet De Oliveira: That's great. That's great. Good. All right. Where next then after that?

Jenny Lavers: Well-

Japhet De Oliveira: That was 17.

Jenny Lavers: Let's go to 30.

Japhet De Oliveira: Okay, 30. Tell us about something that you're really looking forward to.

Jenny Lavers: That vacation.

Japhet De Oliveira: The vacation.

Jenny Lavers: That vacation. I'm going to Turks and Caicos.

Japhet De Oliveira: Oh, nice.

Jenny Lavers: I know.

Japhet De Oliveira: That's awesome.

Jenny Lavers: I feel like that too. I've never been. It's a big vacation. I'm excited.

Japhet De Oliveira: That's really good. That is really good. How long are you going to go for?

Jenny Lavers: Like six days.

Japhet De Oliveira: Oh, good, good. Just enough time to kind of like... And then come back.

Jenny Lavers: Yeah.

Japhet De Oliveira: Yeah. That's good. All right, that was 30. Where next?

Jenny Lavers: My gosh, there's so many questions.

Japhet De Oliveira: I know. Isn't it great?

Jenny Lavers: It's wonderful. I know.

Japhet De Oliveira: It's like random joy.

Jenny Lavers: I thought we made it to 99.

Japhet De Oliveira: No, no, it's about time.

Jenny Lavers: Okay. I need to talk slower.

Japhet De Oliveira: We could do more questions.

Jenny Lavers: All right, let's go with 45.

Japhet De Oliveira: 45. All right. When people come to you for help, what are they usually asking for?

Jenny Lavers: Money.

Japhet De Oliveira: Okay.

Jenny Lavers: No, I feel like I am the person people come to when they need to talk something out. So when they have an idea or whatever's going on and they just need to brainstorm it and figure out the path forward, I feel like I'm that person.

Japhet De Oliveira: Hey, that's good. You enjoy that?

Jenny Lavers: I do.

Japhet De Oliveira: I can tell that you do enjoy that. That's good. The conversations are really good.

Jenny Lavers: Yes. And then the second thing they ask for is money.

Japhet De Oliveira: Okay. All right. Fair enough. Well sometimes it's the solution. Okay, that was 45. So where next?

Jenny Lavers: 52.

Japhet De Oliveira: 52. Oh, this is interesting. Share what motivates you.

Jenny Lavers: I am very competitive.

Japhet De Oliveira: No way.

Jenny Lavers: Okay.

Japhet De Oliveira: Shock me now. Hang on a second. I'm going to paddle myself.

Jenny Lavers: Okay. But people don't think that about me because I was a social worker. And so you don't normally see somebody who's so competitive and also who's willing to talk about their feelings.

Japhet De Oliveira: Are you saying social workers crochet a lot?

Jenny Lavers: I'm just saying that social work in theory accepts people where they're at. Lets people start where they are. And don't get me wrong, that's wonderful. It's just, it's why it wasn't my long term.

Japhet De Oliveira: You just wanted to grab them, take them somewhere else.

Jenny Lavers: I wanted to help them get there faster.

Japhet De Oliveira: Faster. That's pretty interesting.

Jenny Lavers: So what was the question?

Japhet De Oliveira: What motivates you and... Yeah.

Jenny Lavers: Okay. So I'm competitive and I come from a long line of healthcare people. I'm sure there's jokes about that. My mom's a nurse, my sister's a nurse, my aunts are nurses, my mother-in-law's a nurse. And I did not become a nurse. But I feel like the care that we provide people, the thing that motivates me at the end of the day, beyond my own personal competition, all of that, is raising the level of care that the people in our community get. I mean, at the end of the day, I want to look in anyone's face when I go to the grocery store, when I am out at the park, wherever I am, and be proud that I am ensuring that the services that they're offered without having to leave are the best possible. And that's what motivates me.

Japhet De Oliveira: Yeah. Where did that come from? That's a bonus question by the way, 52A. You're welcome.

Jenny Lavers: Thank you.

Japhet De Oliveira: Because that's not everybody's thing. It's not just about competition, like you said. Where does the desire to not only be brilliant, but why?

Jenny Lavers: I think it goes back, I mean, how does that really tie to the social work stuff is it's my desire to help people and I was just always a helper my whole life.

Japhet De Oliveira: You volunteered as a child all the time?

Jenny Lavers: Yes.

Japhet De Oliveira: Is that big in your family or was that just like... You see where I'm getting here?

Jenny Lavers: Yeah. I mean, I was talking to my mom and dad about this. My mom, someone asked her the other day, your daughter's turned out pretty good.

Japhet De Oliveira: We were really worried, but they're fine.

Jenny Lavers: How'd you do it? And she said she didn't do anything. But I also was joking, so she was a nurse at a county hospital and she made me volunteer there when I was, I don't know, probably 13. And there was no tube system back then. And so what do you make a 13-year-old do? I was a runner of urine. I took the samples that I ran from the ER to the lab and that was what I did all day long.

Japhet De Oliveira: When you say ran, did you really run with the urine or did you walk it?

Jenny Lavers: Well, it was like a brisk walk. No, I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. I walked.

Japhet De Oliveira: Interesting.

Jenny Lavers: Very securely.

Japhet De Oliveira: Very securely. I was like, that's the one thing I wouldn't want to run with.

Jenny Lavers: No, but that's what they called it. But that was in a county hospital in Southern California. So just from a very young age, I just had a lot of exposure into that world.

Japhet De Oliveira: That's really good. That's really good. I don't know about the running, but it's really good to hear. I mean, motivation's a very tricky thing. So it's like, is it about the end or is it about the beginning or where it comes from? But understanding where that is, that shapes your children, shapes the teams that you lead.

Jenny Lavers: And it all ties back, in my opinion, to just faith in God. My daughter, she's doing the eight simple, I can't remember what it's called, but things about yourself. And it's like the simple facts or simple truths about yourself and splitting it into categories and what makes you you, and I mean the questions that they ask 12 year olds is why do you think God made you that way? So I think God created me with the desire to help people.

Japhet De Oliveira: Yeah, I believe that. I do believe that. That's good. All right, where next? That was 52.

Jenny Lavers: Okay.

Japhet De Oliveira: Yeah.

Jenny Lavers: 67.

Japhet De Oliveira: 67. She says very, very timid about this. All right, what's the best picture you've ever taken and why?

Jenny Lavers: Like a photograph?

Japhet De Oliveira: Yeah, I guess.

Jenny Lavers: Of myself or something else?

Japhet De Oliveira: That's interesting that you went to a selfie straight away.

Jenny Lavers: No, it just, it's a clarifying question.

Japhet De Oliveira: I'm totally kidding. It could be.

Jenny Lavers: This is going really well.

Japhet De Oliveira: It could be anywhere you want to go, yeah.

Jenny Lavers: The best photograph taken I've ever taken.

Japhet De Oliveira: Yeah. And why is it the best photo?

Jenny Lavers: There is a picture hanging in my home and I honestly can't remember if I took it or my husband took it, but I'm going to take credit for it.

Japhet De Oliveira: Take credit for it. Go for it.

Jenny Lavers: And it's my daughter when she was probably four, standing in a tutu with cowboy boots on a fence with my father-in-law standing over her, propping her up. And he, it's kind of inverse of what people expect. My father-in-Law was her main care provider from, I mean, honestly it felt like from birth until he passed when she was seven or eight.

Japhet De Oliveira: Oh wow.

Jenny Lavers: They were best friends. And that picture, it just is the epitome of he was this rough, rugged cattle rancher standing on a fence looking out over the field and there she is in her tutu and cowboy boots. Just happy as can be.

Japhet De Oliveira: That's a beautiful picture. It is. That's a beautiful picture. Man, that's a family heritage moment.

Jenny Lavers: Right? Yeah.

Japhet De Oliveira: Yeah, that's great. Oh, that's great. All right, time for last two.

Jenny Lavers: Okay. What number did I just choose?

Japhet De Oliveira: You just had 67.

Jenny Lavers: Okay. Let's do 79.

Japhet De Oliveira: 79, all right. Share if you would, a painful memory you wish you could forget.

Jenny Lavers: So I had a baby that did not survive. He was considered a 40 week fetal demise and it was in the middle of COVID.

Japhet De Oliveira: Oh my.

Jenny Lavers: And it was horrible in so many ways. And it's probably one of those defining moments on my career on why I decided I wasn't just going to stick in the world that I knew, but we were going to go bigger, better. We were going to raise the level of care for everything. It's that moment where it's like, it's not good enough to make sure that the cancer care is great, but we're going to make sure that the cardiac care is great and you'll keep listing the things. But yeah, there's no words that can describe what that was like, but for me, that's the moment.

Japhet De Oliveira: That's a deep level of grief.

Jenny Lavers: Oh yeah.

Japhet De Oliveira: And it never goes away. What would you say to someone who actually is going through something like that?

Jenny Lavers: You don't say anything. That's the trick answer. You don't. You don't say it's going to be okay. You don't say, I know how you feel. There's actually another leader, and if she listens to this up at the system, she used to work here, she now works up there and she sent me a message when it all happened, something in her life very different, but something just as catastrophic had occurred. And she sent me a message and it was just like, I'm here. And that's what you say, I'm here and you don't have to respond. And that's it.

Japhet De Oliveira: That is really good wisdom.

Jenny Lavers: Yeah.

Japhet De Oliveira: Yeah. Thank you for that. And I do hope that anybody who is listening to this, that actually is going through that replays that.

Jenny Lavers: Yeah. I'm here.

Japhet De Oliveira: That needs to hear that. Yeah, that's good.

Jenny Lavers: That's it.

Japhet De Oliveira: That's good. All right. Jenny, final number.

Jenny Lavers: We have to end with something soft, so we got to go back to the top.

Japhet De Oliveira: We can, we can, we can.

Jenny Lavers: What did we... Like 13, is 13 a softball?

Japhet De Oliveira: 13 is a very beautiful place. Walk us through the ideal end of your day.

Jenny Lavers: See look, that's good question to end with.

Japhet De Oliveira: It's great one for... Yeah.

Jenny Lavers: Ideal end of my day. I love to read.

Japhet De Oliveira: Oh yeah, yeah.

Jenny Lavers: And so my ideal end of my day is I leave work at a reasonable time, ideally. Reality and ideal are not the same, but getting to make dinner with my kids, getting to eat dinner with my husband and my kids. And then it's just a normal night of homework and showers and then sitting on the couch and reading and everybody just being present with each other. That is the ideal end of the day.

Japhet De Oliveira: That's good. That is good. I was just talking in another recording about the value of having a table and having meals with a family and just how precious that actually is. It is really fantastic. So yeah, your end of the day sounds wonderful. Make that happen.

Jenny Lavers: The simplest end of day is the best end of day.

Japhet De Oliveira: The routine is good, but yeah, make it happen. That's good. Jenny, thank you so much for your time. Thank you for the conversation. I want to encourage people to do the same. Sit down with a friend, ask good questions, listen, and we all get changed. We're all changed by this and we're all better for it. So thank you again Jenny and-

Jenny Lavers: Thank you.

Japhet De Oliveira: God bless everybody else until we connect again.

Narrator: Thank you for joining us for the Story and Experience podcast, we invite you to read, watch, and submit your story and experience at adventisthealth.org/story. The story and Experience podcast was brought to you by Adventist Health through the Office of Culture.